The podcast launches today!

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Is it true that after a woman turns 40 or thereabouts, she becomes invisible? In our first episode, Tally and I grapple with this maddening notion, and attempt to come to terms with it—and even to find an upside to it. Along the way, we also cover any number of other topics: Sassy lore, the superiority of Japanese and Korean cotton pads, what we never leave the house without and more. Listen on Stitcher, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify—it’s as easy as clicking on the link. Tally and I recorded this episode in Montreal, where she lives, and had only just met in person a couple of hours before hitting the recording studio, and (to me) it’s pretty clear we’re getting our sea legs in this first episode and getting to know each other, but I think it’s lots of fun, and very, very much look forward to hearing what you think. All subsequent episodes will have guests, and the next episode will be in two weeks.

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63 Thoughts on The podcast launches today!
    nancy
    7 Jan 2020
    7:36pm

    can’t wait. been following you for years. very grateful.

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    LHGray
    7 Jan 2020
    8:39pm

    So loved the podcast – I texted my three sisters and four cousins that it is a must listen. A relevant subject that my sisters and I have been discussing over the past few months. Thank you.

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    Jen
    7 Jan 2020
    5:33pm

    I am feeling radically accepted having listened to you two! Thank you. I too am an easy mark for marketers and really aging, the awareness of aging, and the futility of fighting it has been at the forefront of my mind for 5 years or so (I am 49), and I still have no easy answers. Kudos to those who accept it with grace. On the flip side, I am more daring and bold now that I don’t have to fit into someone’s notions about appearance and behavior.

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    Mary
    7 Jan 2020
    5:35pm

    Loved it, Kim! I will listen to each and every episode you two put out, probably more than once. It was so natural and down to earth, like I was part of the conversation.

    I agreed with so many things you two said, like when younger people are aghast when they find out how old you are. Not because I look so utterly fantastic but because they’re horrified by my age (50) and act as though turning 50 will never happen to them. Like they’re personally responsible for being in their thirties!

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      Kimbersam
      8 Jan 2020
      8:07am

      Yep. I can actually hear them roll their eyes and the whoosh-bamp of the disdain for whatever I just said.

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    c.w.
    7 Jan 2020
    4:25pm

    Just finished listening and am so grateful y’all decided to start this podcast. You and Tally are a great paring––so much fun to listen to and appreciate. As to invisibility…as I fast approach sixty-nine with seventy not far behind (Oy and Egad, can this be true?!?!?!)…I’m finding a great deal of freedom in my invisibility. I only dress to please myself, only do what I want to do etc. etc. etc. My world feels limitless for the first time ever because there is no one, absolutely no one judging me. I am light as air with birdsong in my heart!

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    Morgan Defarge
    13 Jan 2020
    11:48am

    Listened and LOVED IT!!!! I was YES! YES! YES! at almost everything you both said. Then I sent it to everyone that I could think of and hit “subscribe”. Looking forward to the next one and all future episodes.

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    Fashionnerd
    12 Jan 2020
    1:30am

    I liked the podcast, thank you! But I’d like to hear a broader perspective on invisibility. Maybe I’m alone in this, but I’ve always felt invisible to the male gaze as someone who never fit the American standards for beauty. And the post-40 invisibility I feel the most is that of being a single, childless woman, not invisibility because I’m not attractive to men. I’m hoping the podcast will look at some other angles to being above 40, not just physical beauty and attractiveness. Thanks!

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    Lori
    8 Jan 2020
    3:36am

    Yay — congratulations! Can’t wait to listen when I get home tomorrow night! (-:

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    melsybelsy
    8 Jan 2020
    6:42pm

    I listen to podcasts all the time during the daily commute and what makes your podcast special are the listener comments- Loved them! I could relate to everything both you and Tally said and will definitely listen on the regular. Would love to hear how you guys juggle time to fit in stuff that you love to do – at our age this is not so easy!

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    Kate
    8 Jan 2020
    11:27pm

    Oh my gosh, it’s so good! Although I have to say when there is a friendly dog involved I pay zero attention to the person on the other end of the leash. Can’t wait for the next episode!

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    Jackie
    7 Jan 2020
    9:31am

    This is so exciting! Congratulations. I can’t wait to listen on my commute home!

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    Heather
    7 Jan 2020
    9:40am

    So exciting – can’t wait to listen!

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    Kimbersam
    7 Jan 2020
    10:11am

    Congrats Kim! No doubt podcasting is definitely its own ‘thing’ but I am sure you’ll be great. I can’t wait to listen!

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    Viajera
    7 Jan 2020
    10:38am

    Congratulations!!!

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    LeighTX
    9 Jan 2020
    9:45am

    I am about 2/3 of the way through your first episode and have to say–this is going to rate a second listen, and I’ll be telling my friends about it as well. I definitely don’t feel invisible after listening, instead I feel very seen by you and Tally! I’m just to the part about the male gaze and the discomfort in missing that attention, and I have felt weird about that as well–we are supposed to think catcalling is disgusting but it almost feels worse when you don’t rate that attention anymore.

    You touched on something at the beginning that especially resonated with me, about the disconnect between what I see in the mirror and how I feel. I’m in the best physical shape of my life and when I look at my muscles I’m so pleased with how my body looks, but when I see pictures of myself I think, “Who is that schlumpy old lady?” I don’t feel schlumpy! I feel strong and amazing! But realizing that I’m starting to look my age (49) is disconcerting, to say the least.

    Can’t wait to finish listening, and I’m so excited to hear more of what y’all have to say! THANK YOU for putting this out into the world.

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    D.Morgendorffer
    9 Jan 2020
    10:11am

    I have been getting over a tension headache. So, I am only now saying that this podcast was a treat on a rough day. Also, as a black rimmed glasses wearer, I am always pleased to see people who make wearing glasses look good.

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    Kim France
    9 Jan 2020
    11:07am

    Ladies, Tally and I are overwhelmed by your response—thanks a million for listening, and I hope you tune in again!

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    Susanne
    9 Jan 2020
    11:54am

    I. Felt. So. Heard.

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    Carrie
    9 Jan 2020
    12:21pm

    Just finished and really enjoyed it. You two have great rhythm and sound very authentic. Love the F bombs. And I really think you have an amazing opportunity here. I wish you all the best and look forward to hearing more and more! Thanks Ladies!

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    Kim Scharf
    9 Jan 2020
    12:54pm

    I never leave comments or feedback, but your podcast was awesome! Totally relate. Every once in awhile I get misty about the days when I had so much male attention, and now, being close to 60, its all gone! But it doesn’t rule my life, which I love where I am, what I have, and my tribe surrounding me. Just makes me sad sometimes.

    Kim, I love you, your blog and this podcast. Can’t wait for your book.

    ps…when I hear your name I immediately associate you to Lucky, NOT Sassy!!!

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    Sly
    9 Jan 2020
    8:14pm

    Loved the podcast! It’s something me and my close friends talk about all the time… but there was an added depth to your conversation with Tally. I really felt like your comments allowed me to go somewhere else… somewhere beyond “the whine” as Tally called it. I was particularly struck by your comment re benefitting from youth in your career and really appreciated stopping for a moment and thinking about how that applied to my own life. I passed the podcast on to those close friends and each one really enjoyed it. Excited for episode 2!

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    Maureen
    10 Jan 2020
    7:24pm

    It was like having two, relatable, friends with me on my commute. Telling me stories that I was nodding my head along with, saying “YES!” out loud. You spoke to me, ladies. Enjoyed it very much!

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    Seneca Doane
    8 Jan 2020
    7:37am

    Am I the only one who wishes she could have heard the Patti Smith story?

    I am 45. I figure if I can’t be “hot” anymore, I can at least look interesting.

    It’s cruel that the cloak of invisibility has been thrown on me at the time I am just feeling to hit my stride in my career. I had to comment on the topic in the podcast about the fear that you (I can’t remember which one of you talked about this) had advanced career-wise because of your looks and youth. I say take what you can get for the short period it’s offered! How many men our age are wondering if they owe their career advancement to the simple fact that they are male? Very few, I’d bet.

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      Mims
      8 Jan 2020
      6:33pm

      I do not want to hear the Patti Smith story. One thing I have come to understand at the age of 58, is always choose kindness. The subtext is that this story might not be paint Patti in a favorable light. But who hasn’t had a bad day and come across as less than gracious? Also, I work in clinical medicine and now research. People appreciate me and seek me out because I have 30 years of practical experience and a depth and breadth of knowledge that new medical school graduates simply do not have. I blush when I think back on how naive I was, but certainly grateful my youthful face inspired a patient’s confidence, even though it really was not deserved. As for today, well, sometimes being invisible has its benefits, as it insulates you from jerks mostly. Dwell on the positive, be kind, radiate confidence and the people who count will notice you.

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      Kim France
      9 Jan 2020
      11:05am

      The Patti Smith story is indeed ungenerous, which is why I did not share it.

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      c.w.
      8 Jan 2020
      9:36am

      Also want to hear the Patti Smith story. And not for catty reasons. (not that anyone wants to hear the story for catty reasons also I can be QUITE catty when the occasion calls…and sometimes when it doesn’t)

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      Deborah
      8 Jan 2020
      8:56am

      Yes. And I want to hear the Patti Smith story, too! Loved the podcast.

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    Stephanie
    8 Jan 2020
    7:24am

    I’m half way through so I don’t know what resolution you come to. Invisibility is a super power for some people and there’s nothing wrong with a bit of that. I think it gives me more opportunity to observe the world. You guys touch on it a bit but I feel rotten and ashamed at missing the male gaze. I wish I could’ve given my daughters a life where they would miss that when they hit their forties. I’ll keep listening. Thanks for producing a podcast that this thought provoking and funny.

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    Kim
    10 Jan 2020
    5:36am

    Listened and loved it. The subject matter is engaging. Looking forward to more!

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    Megan
    7 Jan 2020
    3:03pm

    This is wonderful, Kim! I listened this morning on my way to work and very much enjoyed it. I look forward to more!

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    Mamavalveeta03
    7 Jan 2020
    3:29pm

    Congratulations, Kim! This makes me 10x more excited for your book. (Your skin looks glowy and amazing, btw.)

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    Adrien
    7 Jan 2020
    2:51pm

    I listened this morning and really enjoyed it! So happy to have a new relevant-to-my-interests podcast that isn’t about politics.

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    jen
    7 Jan 2020
    2:59pm

    Listening now. So good. Definitely on my favorites list. Fun to listen to women having a real and candid conversation about aging.

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    Sam
    7 Jan 2020
    2:11pm

    I just listened. I very much enjoyed it. I think you were unnecessarily harsh on yourself about the lack of catcalling you get these days. Times have changed a lot since we were in our teens, 20s and 30s. I have a beautiful 15 year old and I had to explain the concept of catcalling to her. She was shocked and disgusted that that type of behavior was ever considered acceptable. She honestly never experienced it. Granted we don’t live in a big city but it has to be happening a lot less in general.

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    Ramonaquimby
    7 Jan 2020
    2:14pm

    Yay!! Congrats and can’t wait to listen to my new favorite podcast.

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    Wendela
    7 Jan 2020
    12:58pm

    Downloaded! Looking forward to your company on my commute this evening!

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    Beth
    7 Jan 2020
    12:59pm

    Can’t find it-what is the title of the podcast?

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      Beth
      7 Jan 2020
      4:11pm

      Thanks, I ended up searching in apple podcasts by your name, the recognized the name when I saw it. This was before I saw your reply. I listened on the way to work and look forward to more!

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      Kim France
      7 Jan 2020
      1:07pm

      I can’t believe I forgot to put that in the post! It’s called Everything is Fine.

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    Francine
    7 Jan 2020
    1:00pm

    Congratulations Kim! I really enjoyed it.

    Where can I submit topic ideas??

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      Kim France
      7 Jan 2020
      4:44pm

      Write to us at [email protected]

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        Francine
        8 Jan 2020
        12:22pm

        Woo-hoo, just sent you an email!

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    Diane Bourdo
    7 Jan 2020
    12:04pm

    I still have 11 minutes to go, listening to the pod, but boy it is now my favorite. LOVE LOVE LOVE the conversation, especially your insights, Kim. Like other commentors, I did not find it depressing — I appreciated the candor and honesty of it all. My experience with the “male gaze” has been a mixed bag from the beginning, and as I age (turning 60 in March) my devotion to and appreciation of other women — of all ages — has only grown. Rather than feel forlorn about becoming more invisible to men, I feel energized by other women and find myself caring less and less what men think (okay, other than my lovely hubby). Thanks for the pod!

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    susan mernit
    7 Jan 2020
    12:04pm

    HI, please check the spotify link–didn’t work, and that’s my preferred platform. excited for this!

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      Kim France
      7 Jan 2020
      12:20pm

      Hi Susan, I checked the Spotify link and it’s working for me; is anyone else having trouble with this?

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        susan m
        8 Jan 2020
        5:47pm

        it worked for me when I came back today.

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        Heather
        7 Jan 2020
        12:28pm

        I was able to get it directly from my Spotify app.

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    Nicole
    7 Jan 2020
    11:55am

    I absolutely cannot wait to listen. I’ve been following you for years (Sassy reader, back in the day) and this seems like a lovely next step for you. <3 Congrats on your new adventure! Lucky us.

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    Carolyn
    7 Jan 2020
    11:45am

    I listened in on the way to work this morning. Well done! I will say that I didn’t view the conversation about invisibility as depressing. It was candid and refreshing and created a connection for me. Can’t wait for more!

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    Joannawnyc
    7 Jan 2020
    11:13am

    Your glasses are SO cute! Can’t wait to listen.

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    Lisa
    7 Jan 2020
    11:19am

    As someone who is 63, I can tell you, 40 isn’t the invisible moment. It happens some time around 57 or 58? Definitively not at 40. At least on the streets, and maybe anywhere that isn’t media or entertainment.

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      Dawn
      7 Jan 2020
      4:50pm

      When I was in my mid-40s (I’m 58 now) I was walking toward a client on the street and when we met, he said to me that he didn’t recognize it was me because I looked to be in my 30s, that is until we were up close! He was in his 60s btw.

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      Kimbersam
      7 Jan 2020
      12:34pm

      Unless you live in Los Angeles, where the Age of Disappearance is 35. Kidding–sorta.

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      Lynne
      7 Jan 2020
      11:33am

      Agree. As I approach 60, this is where invisibility really sets in. I am getting better about not caring. But, in a society that still values how a women looks over all else (mostly, there is some light at the end of tunnel) being invisible is hard…

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    Meg
    7 Jan 2020
    11:20am

    I am SO HAPPY you’re in the world and making things. The first episode was great, and it was helpful that you all tried to find a silver lining in the invisibility topic b/c I was by myself in the morning, alone, listening, and I was feeling very vulnerable and at risk of being mired in despair. But thank you! I have spread the word to women I know.

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    Jill
    7 Jan 2020
    11:21am

    Just subscribed. You will become my new commuting buddy 🙂

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    Helen, Valley of the Shoes
    7 Jan 2020
    11:33am

    Just finished listening and I found myself hanging on every word. This was my first time listening to a podcast and now I’m kinda hooked. Thank you both for being honest, it made for an insightful and introspective 46 minutes on the treadmill this morning. You made me laugh instead of pissed reading the closed captioning of the TV news at the gym. A heartfelt thank you for that and congratulations!

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    patricia blaettler
    8 Jan 2020
    12:20pm

    “Male gaze”? I still get it…. by old fat dudes with white hair!

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    Dana
    8 Jan 2020
    12:40pm

    Listened to half of the podcast on the drive into work this morning. Great GREAT stuff. I walk this fine line of wondering, “Am I super vain for worrying that I don’t turn heads anymore?” and “relax, lady, enjoy not being constantly catcalled anymore.” Looking forward to more episodes!

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    Erin
    8 Jan 2020
    12:02pm

    Well it’s official, we need to friends. Don’t suppose you find yourself in Winnipeg, Canada very often? 🙂

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    Mimi
    8 Jan 2020
    10:56am

    Mazeltov and Brava! I loved the first episode – the conversation between you and Tally, the recorded comments of anonymous women and most of all your candor. When you were editing magazines I was writing for them, often exploring topics that essentially revealed the value of shared experience. That’s what your podcast delivered so beautifully – the perspective of others and the assurance that we’re not alone as we face challenges large and small. I remember when an editor asked me to write about Gail Sheehy’s happy talk menopause-is-the-best-time-of-your-life book and I wanted to throw it against the wall. There are silver linings to aging, but denying that there’s also pain and loss doesn’t help anyone. I look forward to more of Everything is Fine.

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    Jennifer Zinn
    13 Jan 2020
    7:09pm

    Congratulations on the first of what I’m sure will be many fantastic podcast episodes! I would never have thought you two had only met in person shortly before recording; you have a very natural camaraderie. Mazel tov; I’m already jonesing for episode 2 <3

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About

Kim France

I was born in Houston, Texas in 1964 and have lived in New York City since 1988. I had a long career in magazines, working at Sassy, Elle, New York, and Spin, and in 2000, I founded Lucky magazine, which I edited for ten years.

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