Here’s what we’re chatting about: advising (or not advising) young people, facing failure, taking feedback as you get older, Instagram etiquette, style inspiration, straight-man Tinder don’ts, shifting priorities, discovering new interests, a book recommendation, listener reviews and tons more. Tune in on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I used to collect Fornasetti candles like this one—in its Otto scent, which is so up my alley: it’s got notes of wood, lavender and thyme, and makes any room you burn it in smell sexy and luxe. But that hobby got expensive, so I switched over to their incense, which was still not cheap but much cheaper, but then they stopped making the incense. You can still find it at some European boutiques, and I might just have to spring for the shipping because I miss that scent so damn much.
My perfume of choice is—and has been for quite some time—Portrait of a Lady, by Frederic Malle. This isn’t a very original choice on my part—it’s their most popular scent—but I don’t much care. The spicy, woody, and ever-so-slightly floral notes combine to produce a truly heavenly essence. Also, I don’t use the perfume, because I find perfume too fume-y. Instead, I go for this Hair and Body Oil, which makes me smell nice, but (hopefully) not overwhelming.
On days I don’t use my Portrait of a Lady Hair and Body Oil—because that stuff is pricey and I treat it like gold—I reach for this body cream from Sol Janeiro, which has a vanilla-caramel-ish scent that I love even though sweet scents are not usually my thing. I also love that this stuff absorbs quickly and is not at all greasy (oh, and also: I swear by this similarly scented body wash).
This Roland Pine room spray from one of my favorite small brands, Soap & Paper Factory, has the most authentically forest-y scent I’ve ever smelled. You can also try candles, soap, and reed diffusers with the same stellar scent.
I became a lavender aficionado in the days that I suffered from migraines: the scent couldn’t ever get rid of a headache entirely, but it did offer a fair amount of soothing relief. This essential oil from C.O. Bigelow is the best iteration of lavender I’ve ever found, and if I’m feeling stressed or like a headache is coming on, I take a couple of deep inhales of this stuff and feel immediately at least a little better.
And relatedly, here’s what it’s like to date a chef. (Grub Street)
On Everything is Fine this week, we’ve got a couple of perimenopause experts answering your questions and it’s very educational, so please do tune in. (Apple Podcasts)
My Tinder Decade: the best piece I’ve ever read about the ups and downs of online dating. (The Cut)
And finally: Kansas had big a pro-choice victory this week—read about it here. (New Yorker)
Archives
About
I was born in Houston, Texas in 1964 and have lived in New York City since 1988. I had a long career in magazines, working at Sassy, Elle, New York, and Spin, and in 2000, I founded Lucky magazine, which I edited for ten years.